Journal
by Lady Stardust
Summary: A reflection of my time spent with Brooklyn.
1. Chapter 1

This is a true story, although I know you will not believe it. It stems so far back into my past that I can hardly remember the beginning. In order to believe what I say, you would need to know so much more than what is written here. In time, I may be able to provide more background. However, only those with an open mind could ever hope to accept what I say as true. It is my hope that you will at least take some of my statements into consideration. I ask for nothing more.

He has always been the kind of person that most would consider to be hard to understand, perhaps even distant and guarded. His minimal use of words might be mistaken as aloofness by those who do not know him well, instead of as the sense of wisdom and nobility that governs his decision to speak. He may also be considered a loner, as he does not spend as much time with the others of his kind (as has been mistakenly promoted by the fiction about him). Most of the time, he can be found up in the tower loft, where he reads extensively, often pouring over old manuscripts on magic. If not in the tower, he is often on some hidden building top or in the shadows of the forested area near the tower. I don't know what he does most of the time when he's gone. I've only gone with him a few times. In fact, only recently did I find out that he had been spending much of his time on some magician trials in which he had earned the highest honor. I can't remember what he called it, I just know that he finally earned the high ranking. He told me later that there are special congregations every seven years back near his home land for those who wish to reach high standing in spell casting. Those who feel they are ready may go to these events and choose to be tested for their magicianship skills. He had been attending for many, many years but had not reached the highest standing. A few months ago, he was given the highest honor and received a very special amulet. He wears the amulet around his neck now, it is truly beautiful. I can tell that he is proud of it, even though he always displays such an even and calm temperament. He keeps the details to himself on what his new ranking implies, but I know that it is an honor that almost no other contestant has ever accomplished in all of history, and I think he may currently be the only living being with such a high level of mastery.

The award that he now wears is the second amulet that he has ever shown to me. The first one he gave to me a long time ago. It holds the power to awaken him from stone even during the day. Although I have this amulet, I do not use it often. While he does not mind seeing the daylight from time to time, he simply seems more comfortable in the night. Now that he has received the highest magician standing, his new amulet gives him the power to turn into human form. He is simply enchanting this way. I have never seen anyone as truly striking as he is. His ethereal skin glows in a pale tone that compliments his white, wild hair. His eyes are an emerald green. His voice remains the same, though; low, quiet, like stones tumbling into the sea. We have gone out for very short times like this, but I can tell that he still feels more comfortable in his original form (not to mention, taking to the sky). He knows that I do not feel any differently toward him in either form, and I know that he chose the form of human for me...even without him saying it. It's amazing how little needs to be said for us to understand each other.

Sometimes, late at night, I go up to the door that leads to his loft in the tower. I can often hear the laughter and sounds of his friends outside on the balcony. Most of the time, they don't know I am there, although sometimes I do say hello. They are used to me stopping by and usually pay little attention to my arrival, and will often greet me with a "He's upstairs as usual" or "He's out for the night, you'll have to try back tomorrow night" (I always try to hide my disappointment to this remark). I am not sure how much they "know" about us; I never ask and I know he never tells them…he keeps his secrets very well.

Sometimes the door to his loft is closed, which usually makes me feel a bit nervous about going up the stairs, even after all of these years. There's something about the first moments with him; I still get butterflies in my stomach. Inevitably as I walk up the stairs, I can hear him say something like "Hey kiddo, what's going on?", which instantly alleviates my reservations of disturbing him. Sometimes he's sitting up on the ledge where he sleeps, reading by candlelight. Other times he's in the loft window, overlooking the balcony, watching his friends. Once in a while, he is practicing magic. Usually we just sit and talk. He keeps things pretty close, so I just listen, and sometimes I find out about things that are going on that even his friends don't know about (for instance, the spell trials). I think he has learned to keep things closer ever since his life restarted in the "modern world". I know it isn't that he doesn't trust me; it's just in his nature. I also know that I am the only one he feels close to.

As I reread this entry, I fear that I might have given the impression that he acts with no emotion. This isn't true at all; he is very passionate. His sense of humor is amazing, but it is delivered at the perfect moment and in the perfect manner, and in his usual quiet tone. He simply does not waste his words. I must admit that I can't recall him ever laughing hysterically over something, but he gives such an enchanting hint of a smile that I know he sees the humor in a lot of things. He is also extremely intelligent, and his advice always ends up to be the most simple answer to any problem. He has adjusted incredibly well to the current time. He likes video games and we have often played them together. However, I can tell that he misses his original time. Sometimes, I ask him to speak in the old language for me. It is so beautiful, even if I cannot understand it. I don't ask often, though, because I can sense the sadness that he feels when he is reminded of the past.

He is strong. Not just in the physical sense…but in every possible way. He moves with majestic fluidity. Although he never comes across as stiff or formal, there is a quality to him that shows just how many years he has seen. It is something in the way he moves, the way he speaks, his views, his ideas. He laughs a bit when I ask him his true age. He has never answered me with a straight number, but instead glints his usual smile and casually will say something along the lines of "it doesn't really matter". I am always surprised by his relaxed way of talking with me, because he doesn't act in the same way around others.

It is very difficult to write about how a relationship has grown over time. All I can say is that he has always shown me kindness and has always welcomed me whenever I should stop by. I know that he would like to see me more often, and of course I him…but I am often so busy that I end up exhausted by nightfall. But I know that he will always wait for me. He always has.

Over the years, I have learned a lot about him. The decision to start writing in this journal was something that came after a long time of thinking about it. The purpose of writing this was not to divulge a secret life that I have to the random reader. I decided to write this for myself, to help me remember certain emotions and experiences. There is so much more to say, but now is not the time. My journey has been full of intertwining magic that will be difficult to explain. As time goes by, I will attempt to include more details, but this may never truly be a finished piece, and the reader may never fully understand the circumstances that have prompted my writings. But I sincerely hope that you have learned something of the depth of my beloved friend. He deserves that much.


	2. Chapter 2

I have been thinking for many weeks now about what else I should write in this journal. I have decided that maybe a bit more description of the setting would be a good next step. I have been speaking a bit about the loft, which is where he spends a great deal of his time. He has always felt very comfortable in the darkness, so everything is minimally lit. Only when moonlight does not suffice will he use a candle or light one of the torches on the wall. For this reason, I am most used to seeing him in the shadows. The door leading up to the loft is usually closed, at least partially. A long wooden staircase leads up to the main area of the loft. Everything in this room has a bluish tint to it from the lighting. After going up the stairs, there is a large, wooden-floored room with very little furniture in it. The staircase is on the far left of the rectangular-shaped room. The front wall has one large window near the high ceiling. This window has a platform along the outside of the building, and he often sits up there and overlooks the balcony below, where his friends usually are. The window is actually directly below the large clock on the building face. On the wall opposite of the staircase is a ledge that is as wide as the entire room. This is where he does most of his reading.

I mentioned that I am used to seeing him in the shadows only. His features are very striking in this way. His hair is a bit longer than you might think; a natural, wild cascade down his back. As I've said before, he wears an amulet around his neck, which is absolutely beautiful. He is very tall and moves with amazing fluidity, and he has unbelievable strength. Something that still amazes me to this day is how he can make his eyes glow. He can do this whenever he wants, but he chooses not to do it often. Every once in a while he will do it just for fun. I ask him what it is like for him, and he kind of smiles his usual hint of a smile and says something like, "it's really not that big of a deal". That's how he is. I think he likes to play that kind of "way" in general. That's why his hint of a smile is so deep.

The other day I asked him what kind of music he's been into lately. He tells me, "Bob Dylan". I just thought that was great. I don't know much about Bob Dylan, honestly, but what I do know makes me kind of laugh knowing he's into him now. But actually, it sort of fits, in a way. He's kind of random like that. Always the unexpected, I guess. It's like when we play video games sometimes. It's so crazy sitting there playing Mario Kart 64 with this amazing guy. And the really funny thing is that he acts so natural about it, like it's nothing, while I'm sitting there trying to get a grasp on the fact that this beautiful creature is next to me.

He doesn't use the amulet he won often, by the way. He wears it all of the time. I know that he is capable of casting a lot of amazing spells now, but I don't ask him about it. I guess because he is so quiet, I don't want to ask him about things, I would rather that he brought them up on his own. When he first showed me the power to turn into human form, I was completely stunned. He has only used it twice. I think it really affected him emotionally. I cannot emphasize enough how beautiful he is, in either form. I remember the first time, I asked him what he wanted me to call him like that, because I wasn't sure if he wanted to be a completely new person or not. He answered with the same name, and added, "what else?", with that same hint of a smile on a very different form. His eyes show the same emotion, I can't explain it. He did not decide on how he would look, incidentally, it just sort of…happened. The amulet translated him, I suppose you could say. But as I have said earlier, I have only seen him this way twice. The first time, he said to me, so quietly and in that same, soothingly low voice, he wanted to know what it could be like…but he wasn't sure how I felt about it…

I told him that I felt the same about him no matter what. The second time we only walked outside together briefly, and went into a few shops. In his human form he is not affected by light, but he is simply so used to being in the night that is just not comfortable like that. Not to mention that he has so little experience being around other people. I could tell that he was very nervous, although he carried himself in such a way that you would never know that he was actually completely new to all of it. The only thing that was unusual about the experience (perhaps to others) was his stunning appearance, which was in some ways not of the time, as his hair was pulled back but still long and very light, and his manner of dress was a bit magical as well. I should add that in his human form he has this strangely ageless face, as in he looks both young and not. I can't quite explain it. At one point during our outing, he mentioned quietly to me that he was not used to being so…ground-bound. So that was another way I knew that he was not comfortable. That was the last time I saw him that way.

The other amulet that he has (I am only aware of two) he gave to me many years ago. For some reason, I think he decided that something with the power to awaken him in the light belonged in the hands of someone else. I think he felt more comfortable that way, so that he wouldn't have the power all to his own. He trusted me with it. I think in some ways he is afraid to become used to things that are outside of his…normal way of life. Maybe that is why he gave it to me. You are probably wondering how it works, as I am certainly no spell-caster. The amulet is actually enchanted. All I have to do is touch it to the stone and he is instantly awake (or vice versa), and the sun does not affect him. I usually use it only for brief periods of time, and only very rarely. I still feel nervous about using it at all. I know he doesn't mind, but I am never sure just what it is like to be pulled out of such a deep sleep, from stone to reality. I really think he just feels very out of place in this world, so he keeps himself at a distance. That's why it makes me feel so much when I think about how he decided to take on the form of a human with the amulet he won. I know how hard it was for him, because it makes him feel even more out of place, but at the same time, he was trying to feel more connected to me. I don't even know what to say, I mean, what does a person say to something like that? It is such an unbelievable sacrifice to become something you are uncomfortable with in order to feel something you are not sure how to feel. That is how he is, unbelievably kind.


End file.
